Classic Porn Parody

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Classic Porn Parody review

Site niche info

Primary Category: Vintage
This site in the top twenty Vintage
Other Category: no other categories

Price

Trial: 4.95 $ (3 days recurring)
Monthly: 29 $ (30 days recurring)
3 Month: 49 $ (90 days non-recurring)
1 Year: 99 $ (365 days non-recurring)

Scores

Content Quality
12 / 20  
Amount of Content
12 / 20  
Updates
2 / 15  
Site Design and navigation
8 / 15  
Originality
11 / 15  
Extras
2 / 15  
Other Review Rating
7 / 10 (3 sites)
SCORE:
47 Average

Review porn site: Classic Porn Parody

About site

You know, when I first hit Classic Porn Parody, I didn't even know how to react to this site, really. Was I to jack off to a good load of hot vintage action or was I to laugh my ass off at all those parodies that often turn out to be so funny – like that Superman movie featuring absolutely crazy guy who should have rather taken the job of a comic actor than a porn star... Anyway, at least this site didn't leave me indifferent – it got me mesmerized from the very first sight!

Free tour

So, judging by the stuff that I see on the free tour pages here, classicpornparody.com is all about good old retro stuff spiced up with some fun in some of the cases. The majority has hardly got anything to do with humor though – they are parodies on the most famous movies, TV shows and soap operas of the era. Saturday Night Beaver, Wet Science, Pulp Friction... The names already sound tempting enough for you to want to have a look at it, don't they? :) Gina Carrera in Lust on the Orient Xpress, John Holmes in Spirit of the Seventy Sex, Amber Lynn in Crocodile Blondee – damn, that appears to be a fuckin' must-see! :)

Amount of Content

The collection of the described XXX site is definitely not the biggest one I have ever seen in my life. Out of all the porn that was shot during the Golden Age these guys have taken only 54 movies. 54 movies and that's it. I also believe that there will be no updates made at this site – at least until the moment when 2000's will start being perceived as retro as well. On the other hand, all those 54 movies are parodies – the owners of this one obviously stick with the unique concept they have chosen for their resource no matter what.

Content Quality

The quality of the videos here... Well, it's retro! :) Bet you didn't expect to find HD inside this one, have you? The movies are all rather blurred, which obviously makes you understand that the stuff you are watching is vintage – just as if you are back to you VHR player and little TV with the screen as curvy as a chunky porn star's ass. :) In spite of that, they are all quite nice-sized, which might make the process of downloading them a real pain in the ass for those of you who don't have a connection speedy enough. I myself haven't seen a single one that was less than 700Mb in size so far.

Bonuses

Any bonuses? Well, I expected some to be there, no doubt – at least because the front page of this website said it contained more than 600 vintage porn videos. I go to the Members area and they are not there. I surf back to the Join page hoping to find the link to that bigger archive – and it's not there. Damn, I'm sure I have tried every fuckin' link at this site – and where are the goddamn 600 movies? Homie, that's even more than just disappointing.

Usability

Um, oh whew... There's one bad thing I have to say about this porn paysite straight from the start. It's either that this site itself is a parody on the good old times or that it was lying in vain for quite some time already cause the design of it is just fucked up! Reminds me of the Pacman stuff I used to play on my very first computer. Those pixel art graphics... Damn, that's not too appealing. But that's retro porn after all, baby – you've got to meet the requirements of the category you play in.

Conclusion

You know, if there weren't that abovementioned problem with the bonuses, I would have given this site a pretty high rating because it really entertained me well but... With such a serious disadvantage as a broken promise it just can't get high no matter what. Feel free to accuse me of being not tolerant enough – but cheating customers is not a trace of good morals, for sure.

Screenshots

screenshot 1 (2010-12-05)
Screenshot #1 (2010-12-05)
screenshot 2 (2010-12-05)
Screenshot #2 (2010-12-05)

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